If you know me at all, you know I LOVE my job, I love my boss, and I love a select number of my coworkers (some are just dumb and try my patience).... well let me just say, the past 2 days have really tested my commitment to my job. I work in an office that ensure the civil rights of a VERY large number of employees. Most of the time, the claims we get are frivolous, or people trying to save their jobs, or people who are just ridiculous...oh the stories I COULD tell. But that is not what I have been upset about. It's the hypocrites and people that will commit kamikaze acts on your professional career that bother me.
We had received a case, where a woman claimed she was targeted for bad evaluations because of her race...after 20 years of employment, she suddenly halfway through the year, started getting bad reviews. 20 years of wonderful evaluations, and a sudden 180...odd but not impossible. We looked into it, EXTENSIVELY, and no it wasn't because of her race, but it most certainly was not necessarily fair. We were in agreement with the department who handles performance, this one didn't pass the stink test. At least that was the meeting we had last week. Then we set up a meeting with her boss for this week, to let her know we were recommending a transfer for a clean start to provide another evaluation, with fresh eyes. If she bombed, she was out. Then we get called to a meeting, with my boss's boss, and no idea what it's for.
We get in the meeting, and we get SLAMMED. Totally blindsided. This other department, their number 1 and 2, to our number 1 and 2, totally throw us under the bus and run back over us 4 more times. They think she is a bad employee, no hope in any other location. WHAT?! So we are left holding our transfer recommendation, which by the way we have no power to carry out, and my boss's boss, telling us he wants "independent" investigations, but he just can't agree here. Funny, considering the accused is a friend of yours! Last time we investigated a friend of yours, you told us what to find then too. So I left the meeting with 1) a complete loss of respect for 2 individuals I truly believed in before, and 2) wondering what my purpose really is?
My boss assured me, its a matter of picking your battles, and in this case, this employee will seek other recourse, and likely will prevail as we have anticipated...so let them have their choice and eventually this woman will get a big fat check. But I can't help but be completely dissatisfied. Last week, when we agreed on her transfer, I left work that day thinking, "Wow, for the first time, we were really able to make a difference." Now I wonder what our purpose is at all. And I am left thinking that integrity really is rare in the professional world when it gets down to it. It makes me ill, and it convinces me, that this other office leader is certainly up for my boss's boss's job....now that he announced his retirement.
Now that I am done with that rant, let me start another one....A. and I moved to the DC area years ago. We have lived here for years. We left NY after I graduated law school. My parents moved to Florida. My grandparents died, and my mom's family - who knows, who cares. The only thing I had in NY was my sister. Now people in my family are reaching out to me, which is great, but they keep bringing up that we should move back to NY. Even my husband keeps broaching the subject. Really? Is there some magic in NY I missed? Last I checked the job market in DC is better that upchuck NY. Sure my husband's family is there, but we already established that even in NY, they wouldn't do much more than they do now. Life would be not much different, with the exception that my sister would not have to drive as much. Why would I leave my life? My job, which sure is frustrating, but I LOVE. If someone missed the last 30 years of my life, that is not my fault and I am kind of tired of hearing about how its time to make up for it. Ok, you want to make up for it, make up for it from there.
On a good note, unemployed A. was nice enough to get me a bottle of wine - the big one - and ice cream when I got home. Not good for my diet, but absolutely good for me!
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